"If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over.”- Matthew 18:15
One of the things that most of us could do better in is “conflict resolution”. Why is that so important? Because you are going to experience conflict in life. Jesus said we would have trouble. If we can learn how to resolve the trouble quickly we can ease the stress in our lives.
If someone wrongs you, chances are you call someone you can trust and explain what they did and try to find someone to sympathize with what happened to you. But this is not the biblical way to resolve conflict. You should go directly to the one that has committed the sin against you and “show them their fault”. That simply means you must explain how the things that they did affected you. I think that many times people hurt our feelings or make us angry and they aren’t even aware of what they did! That is why we should go to the person.
As a pastor I often find myself in the midst of conflicts among people. Most of the folks at our church know that if they come to me and talk about someone else, the first thing I am going to do(after telling them to stop), is to take the directly to the person they were talking about so we can move to a solution. I have to tell you that I don’t have a lot of folks talk to me about other people!
I think God wants us to live with expertise in the conflict resolution area.When you look to blame, you b-lame! The sooner situations are resolved the sooner His grace and mercy can have a platform to show up strong. If they listen to your heart, you will win a friend.
Have you been wronged by a friend, a co-worker, or loved one? Are you living with anger and resentment over what happened? Did you call one of your friends to vent? The church calls it “sharing” but the reality is that it’s still gossip! Let’s move towards a resolve today and take away the power that conflict has. Don’t go to the phone: go to the throne of God!